Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Gettin' Cultured

It's exhausting feeling like an idiot all of the time. Everything from buying groceries, to trying to figure out what that weird traffic sign you never have seen means takes its toll. We knew this before we left, all of the "it will be hard at first" and "hang in there's" are coming to mind. It just seems like some days, nothing can go right, like you are Sisyphus, pushing the boulder up the mountain, only to reach to top to have it roll down again. 

Yesterday I went to get groceries, put them in the trunk and got into the car. Sat there for a good minute before I realized I was sitting in the passengers seat, and that the invisible chauffeur wasn't going to drive me home.

When you take your dog to the dog park and get yelled at for having your dog off leash, so you put them on a leash and get yelled at for having your dogs leashed in an off-leash dog park.

Went to Ikea, bought an already assembled wardrobe only to find out that the guy that helped me didn't speak English very well. Completely missed the part about you having to disassemble it in the store yourself before it could be packed or delivered.

When I tried to meet Zach at work for our Intercultural training session, and I explained to the visitor's desk that I was Zachary Tyrrell's wife, he looked at me like I was from another planet and said "not allowed" like I was asking for a conjugal visit or something. After conferring with different security companies, the head of Bayer and possibly Chuck Norris, Zach had to come and save me. Made up a company I worked for because "only business-related people allowed". Needless to say, we spent a long time in our session discussing Germans' obsession with their rules.

When I had to take the 24 page, 300-question long dog test to make sure I was "fit" to handle two large dogs. 

Unknown, seemingly random limits on your bank card. Makes it a problem when you try to buy something more expensive than a bushel of apples. You get denied and everyone looks at you like you are irresponsible to be spending more money than you have, when really, sometimes, you need to spend more than 25 euros a day.(Turns out there are pre-set daily and weekly limits)

We are humbled, and our skin grows thicker daily. So to end this novel of a post, here's me, dead- serious. Like zee Germans.

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